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  1. #1
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    Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    September 26, 2001
    | ISSUE 37•34



    JAHANNEM, OUTER DARKNESS—The hijackers who carried out the Sept. 11 attacks on the World Trade Center and Pentagon expressed confusion and surprise Monday to find themselves in the lowest plane of Na'ar, Islam's Hell.


    "I was promised I would spend eternity in Paradise, being fed honeyed cakes by 67 virgins in a tree-lined garden, if only I would fly the airplane into one of the Twin Towers," said Mohammed Atta, one of the hijackers of American Airlines Flight 11, between attempts to vomit up the wasps, hornets, and live coals infesting his stomach. "But instead, I am fed the boiling feces of traitors by malicious, laughing Ifrit. Is this to be my reward for destroying the enemies of my faith?"

    The rest of Atta's words turned to raw-throated shrieks, as a tusked, asp-tongued demon burst his eyeballs and drank the fluid that ran down his face.

    According to Hell sources, the 19 eternally damned terrorists have struggled to understand why they have been subjected to soul-withering, infernal torture ever since their Sept. 11 arrival.

    "There was a tumultuous conflagration of burning steel and fuel at our gates, and from it stepped forth these hijackers, the blessed name of the Lord already turning to molten brass on their accursed lips," said Iblis The Thrice-Damned, the cacodemon charged with conscripting new arrivals into the ranks of the forgotten. "Indeed, I do not know what they were expecting, but they certainly didn't seem prepared to be skewered from eye socket to bunghole and then placed on a spit so that their flesh could be roasted by the searing gale of flatus which issues forth from the haunches of Asmoday."

    "Which is strange when you consider the evil with which they ended their lives and those of so many others," added Iblis, absentmindedly twisting the limbs of hijacker Abdul Aziz Alomari into unspeakably obscene shapes.

    "I was told that these Americans were enemies of the one true religion, and that Heaven would be my reward for my noble sacrifice," said Alomari, moments before his jaw was sheared away by faceless homunculi. "But now I am forced to suckle from the 16 poisoned leathern teats of Gophahmet, Whore of Betrayal, until I burst from an unwholesome engorgement of curdled bile. This must be some sort of terrible mistake."

    Exacerbating the terrorists' tortures, which include being hollowed out and used as prophylactics by thorn-cocked Gulbuth The Rampant, is the fact that they will be forced to endure such suffering in sight of the Paradise they were expecting.

    "It might actually be the most painful thing we can do, to show these murderers the untold pleasures that would have awaited them in Paradise, if only they had lived pious lives," said Praxitas, Duke of Those Willingly Led Astray. "I mean, it's tough enough being forced through a wire screen by the callused palms of Halcorym and then having your entrails wound onto a stick and fed to the toothless, foul-breathed swine of Gehenna. But to endure that while watching the righteous drink from a river of wine? That can't be fun."

    Underworld officials said they have not yet decided on a permanent punishment for the terrorists.

    "Eventually, we'll settle on an eternal and unending task for them," said Lord Androalphus, High Praetor of Excruciations. "But for now, everyone down here wants a crack at them. The legions of fang-wombed hags will take their pleasure on their shattered carcasses for most of this afternoon. Tomorrow, their flesh will be melted from their bones like wax in the burning embrace of the Mother of Cowards. The day after that, they'll be sodomized by the Fallen and their bowels shredded by a demonic ejaculate of burning sand. Then, on Sunday, Satan gets them all day. I can't even imagine what he's got cooked up for them."



    .
    There is not a truth existing which I fear
    or would wish unknown to the whole world."
    --Thomas Jefferson

  2. #2
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    The whole Arab race should find itself in hell.

  3. #3
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Yes....a nice piece of ficticious bullshit! HOPEFULLY......not too far from the truth!


    Cheers, Pokey

  4. #4
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by danrush1966 View Post
    The whole Arab race should find itself in hell.

    You are a retard. You and douchecrusty are just different sides of the same coin.

  5. #5
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by pwrone View Post
    Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    September 26, 2001
    | ISSUE 37•34

    .
    You mean Atta is hanging out in Culver City? He should have stayed away from Pinks on the way.
    Last edited by dchristie; 09-12-2010 at 02:57 PM.
    "The best case against democracy is a five minute conversation with the average voter"
    -- Winston Churchill

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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by danrush1966 View Post
    The whole Arab race should find itself in hell.

    Say "hello" for us.

  7. #7
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by pwrone View Post
    Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    September 26, 2001 | ISSUE 37•34



    JAHANNEM, OUTER DARKNESS—The hijackers who carried out the Sept. 11 attacks on the World Trade Center and Pentagon expressed confusion and surprise Monday to find themselves in the lowest plane of Na'ar, Islam's Hell.


    "I was promised I would spend eternity in Paradise, being fed honeyed cakes by 67 virgins in a tree-lined garden, if only I would fly the airplane into one of the Twin Towers," said Mohammed Atta, one of the hijackers of American Airlines Flight 11, between attempts to vomit up the wasps, hornets, and live coals infesting his stomach. "But instead, I am fed the boiling feces of traitors by malicious, laughing Ifrit. Is this to be my reward for destroying the enemies of my faith?"

    The rest of Atta's words turned to raw-throated shrieks, as a tusked, asp-tongued demon burst his eyeballs and drank the fluid that ran down his face.

    According to Hell sources, the 19 eternally damned terrorists have struggled to understand why they have been subjected to soul-withering, infernal torture ever since their Sept. 11 arrival.

    "There was a tumultuous conflagration of burning steel and fuel at our gates, and from it stepped forth these hijackers, the blessed name of the Lord already turning to molten brass on their accursed lips," said Iblis The Thrice-Damned, the cacodemon charged with conscripting new arrivals into the ranks of the forgotten. "Indeed, I do not know what they were expecting, but they certainly didn't seem prepared to be skewered from eye socket to bunghole and then placed on a spit so that their flesh could be roasted by the searing gale of flatus which issues forth from the haunches of Asmoday."

    "Which is strange when you consider the evil with which they ended their lives and those of so many others," added Iblis, absentmindedly twisting the limbs of hijacker Abdul Aziz Alomari into unspeakably obscene shapes.

    "I was told that these Americans were enemies of the one true religion, and that Heaven would be my reward for my noble sacrifice," said Alomari, moments before his jaw was sheared away by faceless homunculi. "But now I am forced to suckle from the 16 poisoned leathern teats of Gophahmet, Whore of Betrayal, until I burst from an unwholesome engorgement of curdled bile. This must be some sort of terrible mistake."

    Exacerbating the terrorists' tortures, which include being hollowed out and used as prophylactics by thorn-cocked Gulbuth The Rampant, is the fact that they will be forced to endure such suffering in sight of the Paradise they were expecting.

    "It might actually be the most painful thing we can do, to show these murderers the untold pleasures that would have awaited them in Paradise, if only they had lived pious lives," said Praxitas, Duke of Those Willingly Led Astray. "I mean, it's tough enough being forced through a wire screen by the callused palms of Halcorym and then having your entrails wound onto a stick and fed to the toothless, foul-breathed swine of Gehenna. But to endure that while watching the righteous drink from a river of wine? That can't be fun."

    Underworld officials said they have not yet decided on a permanent punishment for the terrorists.

    "Eventually, we'll settle on an eternal and unending task for them," said Lord Androalphus, High Praetor of Excruciations. "But for now, everyone down here wants a crack at them. The legions of fang-wombed hags will take their pleasure on their shattered carcasses for most of this afternoon. Tomorrow, their flesh will be melted from their bones like wax in the burning embrace of the Mother of Cowards. The day after that, they'll be sodomized by the Fallen and their bowels shredded by a demonic ejaculate of burning sand. Then, on Sunday, Satan gets them all day. I can't even imagine what he's got cooked up for them."



    .
    This would be impossible for them to find themselves in Islams hell.... They arent Islamic remember??

    :cwm2: :cwm2: :cwm2:

    I love the Onion!
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    - Thomas Sowell
    http://www.tsowell.com/

    *********

  8. #8
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    Yawn... is offline I ain't got time for pedantic Ghandi type internet nerds
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by pwrone View Post
    Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    September 26, 2001 | ISSUE 37•34



    JAHANNEM, OUTER DARKNESS—The hijackers who carried out the Sept. 11 attacks on the World Trade Center and Pentagon expressed confusion and surprise Monday to find themselves in the lowest plane of Na'ar, Islam's Hell.


    "I was promised I would spend eternity in Paradise, being fed honeyed cakes by 67 virgins in a tree-lined garden, if only I would fly the airplane into one of the Twin Towers," said Mohammed Atta, one of the hijackers of American Airlines Flight 11, between attempts to vomit up the wasps, hornets, and live coals infesting his stomach. "But instead, I am fed the boiling feces of traitors by malicious, laughing Ifrit. Is this to be my reward for destroying the enemies of my faith?"

    The rest of Atta's words turned to raw-throated shrieks, as a tusked, asp-tongued demon burst his eyeballs and drank the fluid that ran down his face.

    According to Hell sources, the 19 eternally damned terrorists have struggled to understand why they have been subjected to soul-withering, infernal torture ever since their Sept. 11 arrival.

    "There was a tumultuous conflagration of burning steel and fuel at our gates, and from it stepped forth these hijackers, the blessed name of the Lord already turning to molten brass on their accursed lips," said Iblis The Thrice-Damned, the cacodemon charged with conscripting new arrivals into the ranks of the forgotten. "Indeed, I do not know what they were expecting, but they certainly didn't seem prepared to be skewered from eye socket to bunghole and then placed on a spit so that their flesh could be roasted by the searing gale of flatus which issues forth from the haunches of Asmoday."

    "Which is strange when you consider the evil with which they ended their lives and those of so many others," added Iblis, absentmindedly twisting the limbs of hijacker Abdul Aziz Alomari into unspeakably obscene shapes.

    "I was told that these Americans were enemies of the one true religion, and that Heaven would be my reward for my noble sacrifice," said Alomari, moments before his jaw was sheared away by faceless homunculi. "But now I am forced to suckle from the 16 poisoned leathern teats of Gophahmet, Whore of Betrayal, until I burst from an unwholesome engorgement of curdled bile. This must be some sort of terrible mistake."

    Exacerbating the terrorists' tortures, which include being hollowed out and used as prophylactics by thorn-beeped Gulbuth The Rampant, is the fact that they will be forced to endure such suffering in sight of the Paradise they were expecting.

    "It might actually be the most painful thing we can do, to show these murderers the untold pleasures that would have awaited them in Paradise, if only they had lived pious lives," said Praxitas, Duke of Those Willingly Led Astray. "I mean, it's tough enough being forced through a wire screen by the callused palms of Halcorym and then having your entrails wound onto a stick and fed to the toothless, foul-breathed swine of Gehenna. But to endure that while watching the righteous drink from a river of wine? That can't be fun."

    Underworld officials said they have not yet decided on a permanent punishment for the terrorists.

    "Eventually, we'll settle on an eternal and unending task for them," said Lord Androalphus, High Praetor of Excruciations. "But for now, everyone down here wants a crack at them. The legions of fang-wombed hags will take their pleasure on their shattered carcasses for most of this afternoon. Tomorrow, their flesh will be melted from their bones like wax in the burning embrace of the Mother of Cowards. The day after that, they'll be sodomized by the Fallen and their bowels shredded by a demonic ejaculate of burning sand. Then, on Sunday, Satan gets them all day. I can't even imagine what he's got cooked up for them."

    .
    Damm it Pwrone.

    Stop posting fake news !!!!!!!!!

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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by Yawn... View Post
    Damm it Pwrone.

    Stop posting fake news !!!!!!!!!
    I'll explain this so you can understand.

    This is a political forum, not a news forum. I read pwrone's post, and while it is not exactly current, it DOES relate to politics in the USA.

    If you cannot understand this, you have no place being a mod here.

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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by brywilson2 View Post
    I'll explain this so you can understand.

    This is a political forum, not a news forum. I read pwrone's post, and while it is not exactly current, it DOES relate to politics in the USA.

    If you cannot understand this, you have no place being a mod here.
    This is in response to pwrone complaining about Yawn posting an Onion article. You know, calling pwrone on his hypocritical bullshit?

  11. #11
    Yawn...'s Avatar
    Yawn... is offline I ain't got time for pedantic Ghandi type internet nerds
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by brywilson2 View Post
    I'll explain this so you can understand.

    This is a political forum, not a news forum. I read pwrone's post, and while it is not exactly current, it DOES relate to politics in the USA.

    If you cannot understand this, you have no place being a mod here.
    Is this news, or is it politics ?



    The answer can be found: http://www.scam.com/showthread.php?t...ighlight=onion
    Last edited by Yawn...; 08-14-2012 at 11:17 PM.

  12. #12
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    is it just ME or is SOMEBODY fascinated with HELL!? didn't jesus go to hell!? why is THIS in POLITICS!? why no SOURCE on the PIECE!? i'm watchin tv, brockovich's t i t s are too saggy, i cant get a woody!? i wasn't here, i didnt say this!? : :yelcutelaughA: :spin2: :
    Last edited by lexx; 08-14-2012 at 11:30 PM.
    i do not endorse/recommend any advertising on scam.com associated with my name /posts or otherwise. thank you

  13. #13
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by brywilson2 View Post
    I'll explain this so you can understand.

    This is a political forum, not a news forum. I read pwrone's post, and while it is not exactly current, it DOES relate to politics in the USA.

    If you cannot understand this, you have no place being a mod here.

    Well, I complained about a thread that started with an 'onion' story because I am weary of liberal scum burying threads they don't like for the reason of 'not politics' (though nearly all of them are CLEARLY politics).

    His thread, and possibly this one, is an example of the kind of thread we need to allow here, but not if it only applies to certain members of a certain political philosophy. You never heard such derision as when I used the word 'fair' as a suggestion to liberals...LOL

    Anywho, long story short (too late?), I claimed that I had never posted fake news as a thread, and he proved me wrong.




    That reminds me of a time when I went to the Hard Rock Cafe in Myrtle Beach and watched Jeff Beck bring an audience to tears with his rendition of A Day in the Life...




    .







    .
    Last edited by pwrone; 08-14-2012 at 11:35 PM.
    There is not a truth existing which I fear
    or would wish unknown to the whole world."
    --Thomas Jefferson

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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by pwrone View Post
    Well, I complained about a thread that started with an 'onion' story because I am weary of liberal scum burying threads they don't like for the reason of 'not politics' (though nearly all of them are CLEARLY politics).

    His thread, and possibly this one, is an example of the kind of thread we need to allow here, but not if it only applies to certain members of a certain political philosophy. You never heard such derision as when I used the word 'fair' as a suggestion to liberals...LOL

    Anywho, long story short (too late?), I claimed that I had never posted fake news as a thread, and he proved me wrong.




    That reminds me of a time when I went to the Hard Rock Cafe in Myrtle Beach and watched Jeff Beck bring an audience to tears with his rendition of A Day in the Life...




    .
    I have it on good authority that Beck is a Liberal.

    Did you at least check before you patronized the work of a filthy liberal?

    He hangs out with notoriously filthy liberals like Mick Jagger and Elton John.

    In fact, most of the popular music business is infiltrated by liberal filth.

    You hate everything that is progressive.

    Why would a repressed right-wing statist fart go to see a musician who plays progressive jazz-rock?

    Isn't Ted Nugent and Hank Williams Jr. more your speed, cowboy?

    .



    .
    Last edited by dchristie; 08-15-2012 at 07:10 AM.
    "The best case against democracy is a five minute conversation with the average voter"
    -- Winston Churchill

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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    sure, why not? Just for you--

    enough liberal sentiment here for ya?





    .
    There is not a truth existing which I fear
    or would wish unknown to the whole world."
    --Thomas Jefferson

  16. #16
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    Re: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by pwrone View Post
    sure, why not? Just for you--

    enough liberal sentiment here for ya?





    .
    Thanks but I'm not a fan..

    But it's good that there's product for the under 4 audience.

    .
    "The best case against democracy is a five minute conversation with the average voter"
    -- Winston Churchill

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