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  #1  
Old 10-18-2007, 06:48 AM
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Child Dilemma

Did anyone catch that news item recently, I think it was in the C Republic, in which nurses, as an act of malevolence, swapped two babies around, so that the parents finished up with the wrong child?

How bad would that be?

Thankufully, as bad as it is, the authorites identified what happener much sooner, rather than later.

However...

Imagine this.

Let's say that you are a parent.

Let's say that your only child was eight.

Then one day, you get contact, that proves that eight years ago, the children had been swapped over, and you had spent those past eight years bringing up a child who, biologically, was not your own.

Meanwhile, elsewhere, your bilogical child had been brought up by two other unwitting parents.

What would you want to do?

I mean, leave aside the legalities, if it were up to you, would you prefer to leave things as they were, you would, after all, have built up a tremendous bond with this child that you thought was your own, or would you prefer to give this child back, and take your own biolgical child instead?

Discuss...


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Old 10-23-2007, 01:58 PM
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TheWarMaiden TheWarMaiden is offline
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Re: Child Dilemma

Whew! That's a tough one! But I think that if I was in that situation I'd keep the child I'd brought up as my own. However, I'd want to know where and how my biological child was. If he was in a bad home I'd definitely want custody of him. If he was with good, loving parents I'd treat the situation as if there had been an adoption. I'd write a letter for my child to open when he came of age, telling him all about myself and the situation and that I would welcome him into my life IF it was his choice. I wouldn't put any guilt trip on him, like calling myself his "real" mother. Having gone through the trauma of discovering that the people who raised him weren't his biological parents, I wouldn't add more stress to his life. If he wanted to contact me and get to know me I'd be thrilled, but if he didn't I'd respect his choice, even though I'd be heartbroken. That's how I'd handle a situation I hope I'll NEVER experience.
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Old 10-23-2007, 03:10 PM
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carolinahound carolinahound is offline
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Re: Child Dilemma

I think, as long as the other parents were good and loving parents and they agreed, I'd leave things as they were and keep in contact letting each other know how each child was doing. When the children got older, old enough to grasp what had happened, I think the truth should be told to them. Then let them decide as to wether or not to spend time with the other parents, getting to know them. At the age of eight they wouldn't be able to understand it, but trying to keep it from them forever is likely not to work, as those things tend to get found out. To me that would be harder, and perhaps more cruel than being honest with them from the point they are old enough to understand what happened.
On the other hand, were those parents abusive or other such things, I'd fight tooth and nail to get custody of both children.
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Old 10-25-2007, 08:43 PM
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Re: Child Dilemma

This occurs more than people realize.

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Old 10-25-2007, 11:52 PM
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4u2nv 4u2nv is offline
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Re: Child Dilemma

Wow... that is a really tough one. But because I've raised the child I thought was mind, I would actually leave things the way they were. And then swap the kids every 6 months or so with the other parents so I can get to know my biological child while they can get to know their biological child as well. Either way, both child will be considered mine. I will never abandon a child that I have raised as my own. Instead, I've gained another child to call my own.


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