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  #1  
Old 03-27-2007, 10:59 PM
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Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Dear Pastor,

I am 8-years old and I am so sad now cause my dog, Scruffy is awfully sick. The pet doctor told my mom that Scruffy has only a few weeks to live because he has a bunch of cancers everwhere. The doctor told my mom that I am gonna see Scruffy when I get to heaven, but she told me that my doctor is not saved, so that I will write to you and ask you the real answer about Scruffy because you know.

Pastor, I love Scruffy so much! I have been trying so much every day not to cry, but when I look at his eyes, he is so sad! My poor dog is in so much pain with his cancers. Is Scruffy going to go to Heaven, Pastor? Will I get to see him again?

Timothy Galvin - Age 8
Freehold, Iowa



Dear Timmy,

It always breaks my heart when I have to answer a question like this. I understand your concern, but I won't lie to you. According to the Bible, there will be no animals in heaven except for horses. And those horses, the book of Revelation tells us, will be used solely as a means of transportation. Scripture tells us that horses will sprout wings and be able to fly at high speeds. We'll fly too, Timmy, but the horses will probably fly faster, which is why Jesus is going to keep them around.

As True Christians™, we can only speculate why God doesn't find it necessary to populate heaven with dogs, cats, cows, chickens and other creatures. Most likely it is because we won't need food when we get to Heaven. Using Bible logic, we have to assume that there are going to be a whole mess of folks in Hell and most of them will be Chinese, since they never had the luxury of hearing about Jesus. People in hell will need food to sustain them through an eternity of torture at the hands of the loving God they rejected. As we understand it, Chinese folks love to eat dogs. I'm sorry, Timmy - it is a hard sight to take in, but in a few weeks little Scruffy will be savagely ripped to shreds, as will countless other pooches, at the blood-stained hands of starving, godless Chinamen as they are beaten and sodomized by demons on the desolate shores of the Lake of Fire. My guess is that those shores will be piled high with the rotting, bone-picked carcasses of every household pet there ever was.

I hope this helps.

Your friend and Pastor,

Deacon Fred



Christian logic? :p


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  #2  
Old 03-27-2007, 11:36 PM
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Quertol Quertol is offline
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

I don't agree with this... :mad:
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  #3  
Old 03-27-2007, 11:42 PM
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peregrine peregrine is offline
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

if this is a true story it really makes me ill. When either of my children asked where our pets went when they died...I told them the Rainbow Bridge Story...much kinder I think.

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  #4  
Old 03-28-2007, 12:06 AM
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Heaven is a big place, I don't see why it isn't possible to have other animals there.

The bible didn't say how all the other people got on the planet either when it came time for the offspring of Adam and Eve to marry, but by golly they went a traveling to find a wife didn't they? A sister would have been right there in the house if Eve gave birth to everyone.

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  #5  
Old 03-28-2007, 12:28 AM
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Lord_jag Lord_jag is offline
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Nice! So if hell is hot too, then could I get my Fido-burger medium well and on a lavarock bun?

mmmmm...

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  #6  
Old 03-28-2007, 03:45 AM
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lord_jag
Nice! So if hell is hot too, then could I get my Fido-burger medium well and on a lavarock bun?

mmmmm...
Ya, I think it comes with rice and an egg roll.

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  #7  
Old 03-28-2007, 03:59 AM
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

the Landover Baptist site is just a satire
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  #8  
Old 03-28-2007, 01:12 PM
sarah913 sarah913 is offline
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Pets do indeed go to heaven, I've seen them there!

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  #9  
Old 03-28-2007, 05:18 PM
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

According to the christians, I won't be going to heaven because I don't think there is a god much less do I accept that jesus is his son. But if dogs do go to heaven, would one of you faithful please look up my old pal Beau? Give his belly a nice scratchin'. He used to like it when I did that.
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  #10  
Old 03-28-2007, 06:44 PM
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Quote:
Originally Posted by bogie
According to the christians, I won't be going to heaven because I don't think there is a god much less do I accept that jesus is his son. But if dogs do go to heaven, would one of you faithful please look up my old pal Beau? Give his belly a nice scratchin'. He used to like it when I did that.
Ya, I'll be happy to.

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When an honest man/woman who is mistaken learns the truth, at that exact moment, he/she ceases to be mistaken or he/she ceases to be honest.

When we are unable to find tranquility within ourselves, it is useless to
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  #11  
Old 03-28-2007, 06:51 PM
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Quote:
Originally Posted by sojustask
Ya, I'll be happy to.

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Don't get in the way of his tail. :)
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  #12  
Old 03-28-2007, 06:58 PM
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Quote:
Originally Posted by UserName
.................................................................................
Your friend and Pastor,
Deacon Fred



Christian logic? :p
This story was silly & cute & entirely believable until "friend & pastor deacon fred" took it into a tailspin. I am not that familiar with denominations, but I had no idea that deacon- do- boys are now considered pastors (wow, it really doesn't take much to be a pastor in some denominations, does it?).

All kidding aside, my pet rock could have come up with a more intellectual version & believable story than that!

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  #13  
Old 03-28-2007, 07:20 PM
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

In John's Revelation, he sees Christ and His army upon white horses... Where do they come from??? :)
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  #14  
Old 03-28-2007, 07:25 PM
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lisan23 lisan23 is offline
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Duh - yes animals go to heaven. Hasn't anyone heard the song "Sheep Go To Heaven, Goats go to hell"?!

(kidding)
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  #15  
Old 03-28-2007, 09:18 PM
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Turnbull Ac Turnbull Ac is offline
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Quertol
In John's Revelation, he sees Christ and His army upon white horses... Where do they come from??? :)
From the imagination of the dude who wrote it.
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  #16  
Old 03-28-2007, 09:47 PM
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Turnbull Ac
From the imagination of the dude who wrote it.

Oh ok...

:eek: :eek:
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  #17  
Old 03-28-2007, 10:17 PM
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bogie bogie is offline
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Quote:
Originally Posted by wiseroption
This story was silly & cute & entirely believable until "friend & pastor deacon fred" took it into a tailspin. I am not that familiar with denominations, but I had no idea that deacon- do- boys are now considered pastors (wow, it really doesn't take much to be a pastor in some denominations, does it?).

All kidding aside, my pet rock could have come up with a more intellectual version & believable story than that!
Does your pet rock read the bible too? Is that where he would get his "believable" story?
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  #18  
Old 03-28-2007, 10:33 PM
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sojustask sojustask is offline
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Re: Do Pets Go to Heaven?

Quote:
Originally Posted by bogie
Don't get in the way of his tail. :)

Why? Is it extra long or just pisses him off?

:D
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When an honest man/woman who is mistaken learns the truth, at that exact moment, he/she ceases to be mistaken or he/she ceases to be honest.

When we are unable to find tranquility within ourselves, it is useless to
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